It’s officially fall, and that means it’s time to spark up the bonfire, sip apple cider, and take on a corn maze or two. Our Corn Maze Survival Kit has the eight items you’ll need to go from corn stumped to maize master.

1. LED Flash Lantern: When the sun goes down, a battery-operated lantern will make finding your way through the maze that much easier. Even with overhead lights, corn mazes can get pretty dark, so be sure to stash one of these in your kit.

2. Clif Mojo Energy Bar: You don’t want to tackle a labyrinth on an empty stomach, but you shouldn’t eat a heavy meal beforehand. These energy bars are the perfect size to keep you going without weighing you down. You’re going to notice a whole lot of crows gathering around you, so be sure to eat one before they take it from you.

3. Ultrasonic Distance Measurer Laser Point: Sometimes, it can feel like the walls are closing in around you. A laser distance measurer helps you stay sane by letting you know if they are for sure. After all, a measurer with an easy-to-read LCD display never lies. Everything's probably fine.

4. Sportline Pedometer: Bringing a pedometer can be a fun way to see how far you've walked and how many calories you've burned in the maze. For some reason, though, this one just says "666," no matter how many steps you take.

5. KissMe! Teeth Whitening Kit: Seriously, what is the deal with all of these crows? And why doesn’t that scarecrow post actually have a scarecrow on it? It’s probably nothing, but just as a precaution, use this kit’s two syringes to disguise yourself as some kind of a Frankenstein monster. Monsters usually won’t attack other monsters.

6. Hamilton Beach Breakfast Sandwich Maker: Make yourself a fresh, hot egg and cheese muffin and take a minute to calmly assess the situation.

7. SoundX Mirror Splash Proof Bluetooth Speaker: OK. The scarecrow is definitely roaming the maze, pursuing his own agenda. Drop the speaker and then hide. Use the speakerphone function to lure him away from you. Maybe say something like, “Me and a couple of the other scarecrows are gonna go out for drinks after work. You wanna knock off early and get a head start?” If that works, you can just follow the scarecrow out of the maze.

8. Box of Matches: That did not work at all. Start tossing lit matches behind you to turn the tables on your pursuer. There’s a risk that the scarecrow will follow you through the flames, catch fire, and lunge screaming at you. If you can keep away from him until his hay and unnatural life force burn to ashes, you’re in the clear. After that, just wait for the whole maze to catch fire, and ride the rising mountain of popcorn to safety.

 (Photo by Mark William Mills and text by Jeremy Stephison for Groupon.)

Find your way to these related reads:

Four Foolproof Ways to Get Lost in a Corn Maze

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