Like a tree house, a gym never lets nonmembers inside and always deflects frogs fired from the neighborhood bully’s slingshot. Hurry up the rope ladder with today’s Groupon: for $39, you get a membership and tanning package at Anytime Fitness (up to a $198.70 value), valid the East Orlando location. This package includes the following:

• Three months of gym access (up to a $113.85 value)
• Three months of unlimited tanning (a $44.85 value)
• Enrollment fee (a $40 value)
  
  

Anytime Fitness, as the name suggests, is open 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and 365 days a year with nonstop security. Novice calorie burners and ripped Michelangelo models alike can take advantage of a three-month membership, which equips bodies with enough treadmills, cycles, elliptical machines, and weights to train them to run a marathon inside of a swimming pool filled with mud. Highlight the results of fat-frying and muscle-mass-magnifying sessions with three months of unlimited tanning in high-powered beds that paint ripply physiques a brilliant shade of bronze.

Memberships also include access to Anytime Health, an online resource for fitness fanatics to plan meals, track workouts, and solicit name ideas for newly developed muscles from friends and other members of the Anytime community.

Though Anytime Fitness sometimes features a discounted price online, this Groupon still offers the best deal available.