Before he reached fame as an octogenarian, Old Man River hustled the streets and sinks of the South as Tiny Todd the faucet leak. See how far he's come with today's Groupon: for $14, you get two adult tickets to a sightseeing tour from Chattanooga Riverboat (a $29.24 value). Tours begin from Pier 2 in downtown Chattanooga, and tickets must be redeemed before September 5.

Chattanooga Riverboat leads clusters of sight-seeking landlubbers on 90-minute excursions across the Tennessee River's placid and wind-swept waterways (a $14.95 value/person). Escape terra firma's cold grip and hop aboard the sprawling Southern Belle riverboat for a stress-free water stroll. Boaters can revel in singular views of Chattanooga while drinking in a narrated history of the tour's stretch of the Tennessee River, including stories of Confederate and Union Army skirmishes in the area and the history of nearby Lookout Mountain and its native species of sentient telescopes. Eyes and imaginations get their fill as ears drink in the antique tones of the Southern Belle's calliope, known to pump out traditional, carnival-esque tunes and Iron Maiden cover ballads. Check out the online schedule to plan your tour reservation.