The existence of prehistoric pottery shards paints a clear picture of ancient artisanal practices while highlighting ancestral clumsiness. Leave behind traces of your own civilization with today's Groupon: for $45, you get three classes at Create in Clay School of Ceramics in Oakland (a $90 value).

Entrenched in the West Oakland art scene, Create in Clay imparts wheel-throwing tenderfoots and experienced crockery constructors alike with spinning-wheel and hand-building ceramic know-how. Master ceramicists oversee three-hour classes, tailoring subject matter to students' skill levels. Class size is capped at seven students to provide participants with instructor interaction and the chance to ask questions about coil-pot composition and what to do when your clay is haunted by ghosts. Pottery pupils can choose from wheel-throwing or sculpture-building classes and perfect techniques for crafting mantle-adorning vases, coffee mugs, and ceramic fanny pouches. Classes are scheduled Saturdays–Wednesdays between 11 a.m. and 10 p.m.

Eager terra-cotta trainees will get up to one complimentary bag of clay and all the necessary beginners' tools for their first class; they must furnish their own cone-five clay (and prove it is cone five or close) or purchase clay for $8 at their second and third classes. Following each session, students will be sent home with a new punch in their punch card and a write-up detailing the day's activities. As when eating a sloppy joe in church, students should dress appropriately and expect to get dirty. Students who wish to fire their work may choose to pay an additional firing fee of around $30 per 2 cubic feet, and firing fees may fluctuate based on gas prices.