Like a shrewd defense attorney, a spray tan can provide the plausible alibi of a Caribbean vacation. Achieve a skin tone to match the bronze scales of justice with today’s Groupon: for $18, you get one sunless Mystic HD Spray Tan at Fabutan Sun Tan Studios on 82nd Avenue (a $39.99 value).

Fabutan Sun Tan Studios helps patrons transform their pallid skinscapes into brilliant golden fleeces with advanced UV-free Mystic Tan equipment. Glow getters can customize their tanning session by selecting a fragrance that best suits their olfactory whims and a colour level that best accents their features. Patrons then hop into a balmy private booth, kept at 32°C to encourage enhanced spray-tan absorption and provide full-body drying during the application process, eliminating the need to clip shoulders to a clothesline. An even mist disperses ultravioletless sun kisses across epidermal planes, and the booth’s MagneTan technology imbues skin with a positive magnetic charge to attract the spray in a uniform embrace. Guests leave Fabutan with a streak-free caramel patina, looking as bronzed and beachy as a third-place sandcastle builder. Depending on skin type and skincare regimen, pseudo suntans can last 3–5 days.