Infrared jade saunas combine ancient stone and modern technology to improve people's health, unlike the attempt to turn Stonehenge into a giant robot masseuse. Reap the benefits of lasting minerals with today’s Groupon: for $75, you get four infrared jade-sauna treatments at Firm Body Evolution (a $200 value).

Firm Body’s futuristic pod saunas cradle bodies atop beds of jade beneath the high-temperature gaze of infrared bulbs. The fiery pulse of the high-tech machinery cleanses pores, liquefies toxins, and burns extra caloric energy without the need to challenge strangers to foot races or siblings to a genealogy bee. A luxurious jade mattress infuses customers with the stone’s holistically renowned benefits, potentially boosting mental acuity or reducing signs of aging. The treatment pod fashions a haven of reduced stress and fatigue behind space-age insulation to quiet ambient city sounds or laugh tracks.

The futuristic saunas reside within Firm Body’s new facility featuring 4,500 square feet of relaxation-oriented rooms. Serene, gentle lighting bathes refreshed skins in soft glows as patrons stop to absorb eyefuls of the Hollywood landscape through capacious windows.