The Tooth Fairy is a burglarizing fetishist specializing in black-market ivory trade, and she must be stopped. Today’s Groupon helps keep teeth in mouths and out of the hands of maniacal, winged phantasms: for $49, you get a full dental cleaning, exam, and x-rays (a $231 total value) at J&D Dental, a family-friendly practice that was founded in 1928.

Inside the calm and comforting confines, patients will receive a trio of mouth-brightening services from a team of skilled tooth mechanics. Drs. Jennifer Herbert and Jennifer DeChant, feared opponents of high-fructose corn syrup, will don spelunking gear and rappel deep into your mouth in search of dangerous cavity caverns and the root of any pains. The dentists will blast out any impudent plaque with a high-pressure hose and capture photogenic pearly whites with quality x-rays suitable for any grandma's mantle.

Reviews

Google Mappers give J&D Dental a perfect five-star average. Three Yahoo! Locals give the business an average of 3.5 stars:

• The staff is friendly and the atmostphere [sic] is as relaxing as one can get in a dental office. a dental client, Yahoo! Locals
• From the second you walk in the door, everyone makes you feel comfortable and like a part of their family. J & D Dental does not feel like your average stuffy dentist office. The staff is friendly; you hear laughter all around and can tell the staff really loves what they do! – Sue, Google Maps