Humans have subjected themselves to genetic mutation experiments to instill superhuman healing abilities for years. Today's Groupon lets you experience pain relief sans genetic modification. For $29, you get a preliminary consultation and 60-minute treatment with Katy Barry, licensed acupuncturist, at Lokahi Acupuncture ($125 value).

Part acupuncture center and part herbal pharmacy, Lokahi is home to three licensed and certified acupuncture practitioners, each with their own specialties. This deal is valid with Katy S. Barry, a Five Branches Institute graduate with certificate specialties in Medical Qigong, Sports Injury Medicine, and Five-Element Acupuncture, which seeks to achieve harmony between body, heart, mind, and spirit. Her emphasis at Lokahi also includes women’s health, emotional management, and muscular-skeletal injuries.

After your consultation and diagnosis, the healing session will take place in a warm room with soothing music, a heat lamp, and no aviaries. Since the hair-thin needles used are sterile and used only once, most patients become so relaxed while the needles are in that they drift off to sleep and dream of a day when baseball players are forced into using pretzel rods for bats and pitchers throw balls of honey mustard. Once your session is finished, Katy may make dietary and/or herbal recommendations for your continued treatment.

Grab this Groupon and finally conquer any stubborn pain or ailments that have been dragging you down and staring at you all weird from nearby mirrors. This deal also makes a great gift for those in need of relief from the daily stress of making toast with a road flare.

Reviews

Yahoo! Locals and Yelpers give the office a perfect five stars, as does one Judy's Book user:

• AMAZING!!! I went in to be treated for my asthma about 8 months ago. At the time I was having asthma attacks daily and it was interfering with my quality of life. I am happy to say that today I am completely 100% free of asthmatic attacks... – Sarah, Yahoo! Local
• I have suffered from lower back and knee pain for over 20years…My first appointment was 8/18/07. This date has become very important to me, like a birthday or a special holiday. My first session…was wonderful…That night I had a full 8 hours of sleep…I got out of bed feeling great. That afternoon my grandson and I went for a short hike. – lnyee_darlene, Yahoo! Local
• I cannot recommend Lokahi Acupuncture enough, it was so refreshing to get a treatment with such a personal touch… – Nathan, Yahoo! Local