Most Americans harbor secret desires to be dolphins, as evidenced by the popularity of laser hair-removal treatments, lessons on how to jump through fiery hoops, and sardines at movie-theater concession stands. Get as smooth and sleek as Flipper with today's deal: for $130, you get three laser hair-removal sessions at Madison Skin & Laser Center (a $600 value), a renowned skin center located in Midtown.

Madison Skin & Laser Center's laser hair-removal treatment decimates body forestry with follicle-neutralizing pulsed light, eliminating the source of hair with minimal discomfort and maximal awesomeness. Blast away cuticle-covered filaments on the upper lip, chin, brow, ears, neck, underarms, bikini line, areola, toes, inner thigh, bellybutton line, or shoulders with a three-treatment package that's good for men and women alike. The treatments are spaced out over the course of weeks to ensure that inactive follicles aren't accidentally passed over, leaving patients with novelty hair patterns that spell out captions to humorously altered Internet photos of cats. For heavily hairier areas, double up and combine two Groupons for a total of six treatments on one area.

Madison's celebrated service ensures that each client gets the personal attention and attentive treatment normally reserved for Academy Award attendees.

Reviews

NY1 and The Wellness Hour featured Madison Skin & Laser Center's Dr. Stacey Silvers, and six Yelpers give her a perfect five-star average.

• Her office staff are wonderful, accommodating [sic], and no-nonsense. Dr. Silvers herself has a warm, gentle manner (imagine if Rachel Maddow were your doctor!) and its clear she knows of what she speaks. I also like the fact that her office is paperless. – Jen R., Yelp
• She is friendly and professional and very straightforward. She doesn't waste your time and tells you exactly what is going on with you and what she can do to help you out. If she can't fix you, she'll tell you. – Christopher S.