Since the rise of the Internet, people have struggled to tear their now-useless phone books in half. Bulk up to succeed where others have failed with today’s Groupon to Newtown Athletic Club in Newtown. Choose between the following options:

• For $49, you get a punch card valid for a five-pass punch card (a $100 value) and a 30-minute personal training session (a $60 value; a $160 total value).
• For $49, you get a punch card valid for a five-pass punch card (a $100 value) and a 30-minute massage (a $55 value; a $155 total value).

The winner of myriad awards and accolades, the 100,000-square-foot Newtown Athletic Club sends gym bunnies hopping through a bevy of fitness classes, high-quality exercise equipment, and a three-lane indoor track, guided by experienced staff. Punch-card holders can take advantage of all membership benefits during their five-day tenure, splashing through the swimming pool, joining a game of basketball during open-gym time, or carving their initials into dumbbells in the fitness center. Group classes abound for the community-oriented exerciser, including Pilates, spinning, cardio dance, yoga, and step; or hit up the 2,000-square-foot martial arts studio complete with punching bags, a boxing ring, and a closet full of cool boxing nicknames.

Gear up to take full command of the amenities with a 30-minute personal training session administered by one of Newtown Athletic’s accomplished trainers, who motivate participants with customized instruction and a command of “We Are the Champions” on the track whistle. Or, after a strenuous workout, relax in the dexterous hands of a massage therapist for a 30-minute deep tissue massage in the club’s soothing, chic spa space.