Paintball is like a production of Hamlet: it's exciting, demanding, and by the end everyone has pretend-died. Take paintball arms against a sea of troubles with today's Groupon: for $17, you get an all-day paintballing session with equipment and 500 paintballs (a $35 total value) at Paintball Adventure Park in Taneytown.

A paint-splattered fixture of the East Coast pigment wars for 12 years, Paintball Adventure Park unfolds over 36 acres of diverse, terrain shifting battlegrounds. Splatter specialists will be entrusted with a paint pistol, a mask, a tank of compressed air (with all-day refills), and 500 rounds of paintballs to brave combat zones replete with enemy fire, scoreboards, and field bunkers swarming with toothy, tie-dyed bears. Evade enemy fire on the Village field, a massive expanse of buildings and trees anchored by a post-apocalyptic castle with eight lookout towers. Channel transcendental alter egos by storming one of PAP's two wooded fields, perfect for camouflaged attacks and penning an action-packed sequel to Walden. PAP is open every weekend, and depleted paintballers can restock and rejuvenate at PAP's on-site store, which stockpiles paintball gear, ammunition, goggles, clothing, and more.