The unrealistic portrayal of cars in TV shows leads children to believe all cars have squealing tires, thunderous engines, and the guts to talk back to David Hasselhoff. Give your car a new image with today's Groupon to Spirit of America Car Wash, valid at the Brookfield, Chicago, Streamwood, Schaumburg, Downers Grove, and Naperville locations. Choose between the following options:

• For $17, you get five premium car washes (a $35 value).
• For $30, you get five extreme car washes (a $60 value).

Spirit of America Car Wash scours vehicle exteriors of detritus and grubby cling-ons with automatic and self-serve washing stations around the Chicagoland area. After redeeming their TokeNote vouchers, customers can pilot their mechanized carriages into the automatic cleaning bay 24/7 for daytime touch-ups and surreptitious nighttime cleanings. Premium washes blast the undercarriage as well as the sun-licked chassis, dissolving away dust-layers and dirt clods before a presoak tenderizes tough exteriors in preparation for the high-pressure rinse. The shining vehicle then receives a clear coat of protectant wax to retain its revitalized new-car glow before a spot-free rinse and drying prepare the car to run errands at sterile hospital drive-thru windows and silicon chip factories.

Customers opting for the extreme wash can expect all of the benefits of the premium option, as well as multiple presoaks and high-pressure rinses to increase the thoroughness of the wash, and a bug-buster. Additionally, the triple-foam polish wax, whipped into a thick lather and dolloped over the vehicle body, increases curb appeal by tactically reflecting light directly into the brain’s pleasure centers.