The blobfish, a semi-gelatinous deep-sea denizen, is the least stressed animal on earth because it receives constant massages from fishermen before being thrown back into the ocean. Reduce yourself to a similarly puttylike state of relaxation with today's Groupon. For $49, you get a 50-minute Swedish massage at The Spa & Salon at Four Seasons Resort, located in Irving. Appointments at least 24 hours in advance are required; massages are available seven days a week.

Swedish massage, a light- to medium-pressure technique, is the one of the most popular type of kneads that is also used on sourdough. It uses long, connective strokes and catlike kneading to improve blood flow, stimulate the lymphatic system, relieve physical tension, and melt stress into a puddle of biodegradable papier-mâché. With deliberate strokes and intense focus, your skilled massage therapist will send your consciousness to a blissful plane where your mind can bob up and down like a Q-tip in a cotton-ball sea.

While you're waiting for the arrival of the hands you've always desired, sip complimentary tea, juice, or coffee in the fashionably modern spa lounge, or pre-liquefy your tension in the heated whirlpool, cold plunge pool, dry sauna, or steam room.

Reviews

Five Citysearchers give the Spa & Salon at Four Seasons Resort a perfect five stars. TripAdvisors give the hotel and resort 4.5 owl eyes, and Yahoo! Travelers give it five stars, with many reviewers raving about the superb spa treatments:

• I was extremely pleased with this spa! Everyone is very nice and you are pretty much treated like royalty there! I recieved [sic] the Swedish massage and everything about it was soooo relaxing! – 8christina7, Citysearch
• I felt like a pampered princess at this spa! I went with a girlfriend of mine, and we had the best spa experience ever! – sonic35, Citysearch
• The spa was lovely, the treatments were great, staff was friendly. – slynnro, TripAdvisor