Welcome to Groupon, Sioux Falls! For our inaugural deal, $18 gets you $40 worth of steaks, drinks, and more at Timber Lodge Steakhouse, located at West 41st Street.

You're probably thinking, "That sounds great, but I've never bought a car or a computer without first reading the Wikipedia definitions for car and computer—I'm not about to buy a Groupon either without a briefing." Well, neither would we, and since this is everyone's first Groupon, allow us to briefly explain how it works.

How Groupon Works

Groupon is a combination of the words group and coupon. Each day, we offer an unbeatable deal on the best of Sioux Falls: restaurants, spas, sporting events, theater, and more. By promising businesses a minimum number of customers, we get discounts you won't find anywhere else. We call it "collective buying power."

If you want to get the deal, just click BUY before the offer ends at midnight. If the minimum number of people (20 for today's deal) sign up by the end of the day, you'll get a printable gift certificate in your inbox the next morning that you can use whenever you want (well, at least until the deal expires—today's expires in six months). If not enough people join, no one gets the deal (and you won't be charged), so invite your friends to make sure you get the discount!

It's nice to wake up to something new every day. Some people get their daily fix from desk calendars with a cute puppy and a funny caption every morning. Groupon is like a desk calendar, except the puppy is an unbeatable discount and the funny caption is a profound reflection on the flowers and needles growing from life's cactus. We selflessly share our deep insights, hoping that you will join our mob of consumers, thus strengthening our collective buying power and commanding even better deals.

Details

Red meat is a great source of protein that helps humans, werewolves, and Jet Skis run faster and more efficiently—particularly humans running from werewolves on Jet Skis. Today's Groupon provides you with a healthy portion of the delightful bio-fuel. For $18, you get $40 worth of steak, seafood, and drinks at Timber Lodge Steakhouse on West 41st Street. This Groupon can be used for dine-in or carryout. Reservations are recommended, so call ahead or send your silver-surfing herald to foretell your coming.

Timber Lodge's menu lets you spark things off with signature lodge fare like the Paul Bunyan fried onion ($7), baked-potato canoes topped with cheese and "special fixins" ($7.50), and the continentally inspired steakhouse bruschetta (sautéed tenderloin tips tossed with caramelized onions and tomatoes, then served over toasted focaccia bread, $9.00). Those who prefer their main courses bookended in bread can choose from eight kinds of hot sandwiches, including a pepperjack burger with a chili-maple glaze and spicy mayo ($10), a Tuscan chicken sandwich with caramelized onions and roasted red peppers ($10), and a blackened prime-rib sandwich topped with provolone and fried onion strings ($12).

Cunning carnivores, meanwhile, will get the sneaking suspicion that the steakhouse might serve steak. See if your seasoned-slab-stabbing skills can sink the Edmund Fitzgerald (7 ounces of filet mignon, $25), pillage the Viking (big, bold, center-cut sirloin, $16 for 7 ounces), or tame the Blue Ox (20 ounces of porterhouse, $26). Rounding out Timber Lodge's diverse board of fare is a selection of fish, chicken, and pasta, including the buttery campfire rainbow trout ($17), chicken breast sprinkled with parmesan and almonds ($15), and fresh-veggie Portage penne amatriciana ($12). More than 15 red and white wines by the glass are waiting at the bar to escort your dinner by torchlight into the dark depths of your belly.

Steakhouses are casual, family-friendly places to celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, and finally finishing your hand-built life-size replica of the Forbidden City. Two of today's Groupon can be combined for five people or more, so bring along your whole family or Civil War re-enactment regiment to Timber Lodge Steakhouse.