The parts of a well-functioning human body are like the planets in our solar system, each moving in harmony with the others as they travel around the earth trying to escape spaceships full of terraformers. Handle gravity gracefully with today's Groupon: for $84, you get a 16-day punch card (a $75 value), a one-hour massage (a $50 value), a one-hour personal-training session (a $35 value), and eight fuel bars (an $8 value) at the YWCA of Topeka (a $168 total value).

The YWCA of Topeka empowers bodies of all ages, shapes, and sizes to attain overall wellness via a fully stocked downtown fitness center and committed staff. A 16-day punch card unlocks a treasure chest of benefits normally available only to members and fitness junkies who sneak in by hiding in laundry carts. Initiates can test the waters with a one-hour personal training session, which introduces them to the facility before trouncing treadmills and whirring away on recumbent bikes amid a sea of cardio equipment. Afterwards, exercisers can cool off with a dip in the five-lane lap pool or wind down in the warm water therapeutic pool or hot tub. Transport summer recreation to a weather-free setting by skipping around a rubberized jogging track, picking up a game of basketball in the gymnasium, sunbathing on the patio, or simulating sunbathing by lying on the floor beneath a ceiling lamp. During your visit, you'll have access to any of more than 70 group exercise classes, from Pilates and yoga to heart-pumping cardio sessions.

After releasing muscles from their many labors, guests can stop by the outpost of a certified massage therapist for an hour of Swedish-style pampering, treating their limbs to long, smooth strokes. A bundle of eight homemade fuel bars stuffs goodies into packages of edible power more nutritious than protein-coated lightning bolts. In addition to its wellness programs, the YWCA of Topeka devotes its energy to empowering women and combating racism with various social programs throughout the Topeka area.